The big day of a wedding is generally focusing in on the Bride and Groom (of course!) and other key wedding party members like the Maid of Honor, the Bridesmaids and the Mother of the Bride. However, one of the most common sights that you will see at a wedding is that Father of Bride perhaps looking a little lost.
Of course, the Father of the Bride has initially, a starring role in the whole ceremony as he is the one who escorts the bride-to-be down the aisle. But the the father figure then kind of fades into the background in the whole proceedings of the day as other party members get their chance to shine. Despite being the one that’s probably stumping up the cash, or at least part of it, to usher his daughter off into her new life, the FOB can be left in the cold.
Think about the pre-wedding customs too, just to highlight a point here. Have you heard very many tales of a groom inviting his father-in-law-to-be out on for a night of revelry at his bachelor’s party? No, we are betting that you haven’t, so the FOB can be feeling less than FAB on his daughter’s big day and may feel like not having much more worth in the proceedings than breaking out the credit cards.
So don’t let the Father of the Bride drift away on the wedding day, because he plays an important role and this is probably one of the most emotional days of his life. Remember that and then imagine how he would feel left out on the fringes of things.
Something that the Bride-to-Be can do to involve her father is to have a First Look with Dad. We know that the Wedding First Look trend is a moment to capture the couple who are getting married in candid shots before the ceremony, but why not engage in some quiet time before the nuptials to have some special daddy-daughter time. Let the photographer capture these sweet moments between the two as memories.
Of course, this isn’t all on everyone else involving the FOB, he needs to step up and play an active role other than throwing on a suit and walking his daughter down the aisle. He can play a massively supportive role in helping behind the scenes. The Mother of the Bride is naturally going to be running around like a headless chicken trying to organize everything and this a great time for the FOB to step in an alleviate her of some pressure.
He can score some major Brownie Points here, such as asking what he can do to to help out on the things that the Mother of the Bride is pressed for time to get done. Maybe it is something as simple as making a run to the airport to pick up a guest that is flying in, or having to run out for some last minute bobby-pins or something. The FOB can make himself available and check to make sure that the Bride hasn’t left anything at home. Those small gestures can go a long way and it can give the Father of the Bride a great sense of importance throughout the day and that he’s not just twiddling his thumbs until he walks his daughter down the aisle.
The other key role that the Father of the Bride has is giving a toast. Just a toast, which is a little odd when you think about it, because the Father of the Bride isn’t even the key speech maker at his own daughter’s wedding, as that is left to the Best Man. Anyway, the daughter will want to hear some eloquent, touching words fall from his lips at the reception and it’s a good idea to get this well prepared in advance. Don’t be afraid to jot a few notes down on a card to help remember. After a champagne or two, this may come in handy.
One idea for more inclusion into the day’s proceedings is to have the Father of the Bride play host (even if he’s not paid for the entire wedding). Towards the end of the reception when guests start drifting away, the newly-married couple may not want to entirely throw away the last moments of their celebrations by saying long farewells. This is where the FOB can step in and go around thanking those who have attended, saving the couple to squeeze in a few more dances.